Letters from You

From: Kathryn

I admire you so. I am a broken 53 year old woman. Been thru a lot nothing like you though. I just wanted to talk to you for some reason. I think my husband my ex broke me mentally. I'm not who I once was. I miss being happy laughing not crying. You r so strong. Thank you for listening.

From: April

Hello Heather, My name is April, I'm 18 and a quadriplegic too. Exactly two weeks after I turned 14 I was in an ATV accident that broke C3, C4, and C5. My right lung collapsed and the right side of my diaphragm stopped working. I was put on a trach just like you, and at night I'd go on a ventilator. The doctors told me that I would never be able to breath on my own, and I had less than a 50% chance I'd get my hands back. Soon after I woke up I moved my left arm. Things started happening and over the four years since the accident I've regained both arms, my right hand and wrist, I can wiggle my toes on my right foot, my hips move sometimes, and I can somewhat move my legs. Almost a year after I got the trach I got it removed and now I'm off the ventilator and both my diaphragm and lung is working perfectly. I never gave up hope and will never give up hope that I will one day walk again. I just finished watching the episode of "The Devil You Know" about you. I also have my own website that I'd love to check out, the link will be at the bottom of the email for you. I want to be a inspirational speaker and I'd love to one day meet you. I hope you're having a wonderful day today.

- All my love, April

From: Michelle

Dear Ms. Grossman: I just watched your story on Investigation Discovery, and though my heart aches for your suffering, and what you've lost, I am completely inspired by your courage and spirit. You are such an inspiration! May God bless you and your family, and the many lives you touch.

- Michelle, Steelville, MO

From: Ronaldo

Heather Good afternoon, I hope you are right now, My name is Ronaldo and I live in Brazil, I saw today by Cable ID Investigation Discovery program and I was very thrilled and shocked at the same time with his life story, I really want to read this e-mail to know that we are here cheering sorry for you and your family too, his sons and their friends, and all the nurses who help in their day to day, you are very beautiful and has a very cute look, we hope that God will always be by your side every day of his life, in his embrace of a mother and father and a loving embrace their children, believe that your story touched me so much and just seeing that sometimes our problems are so small close to events that happened to you, for so God has a purpose for your life here on earth, so it is with us. Stay with God, a loving embrace.

- Ronaldo, São Paulo - SP - Brazil

From: Ella

hi, hru? hope when you receive this letter u r feeling good, my name is Ella, have watching ur story (ID) a lot and am really admire ur strength, faith, don't have a name for you, don't understand ppl, sometimes i ask myself why ppl have to hurt others and specially the MOTHER of ur children., sorry for my English i am not from there, just want to say hi and wish you all the best.

From: Jorge

¡Hola! Heather Espero que al recibo de este Mail Dios te llene de Bendiciones y te encuentres BIEN en TODO el sentido de la palabra. Sabés, he visto tu historia la noche de ayer en el canal "Investigation Discovery" y he quedado empactado y horrorizado de lo que te han hecho. No es justo, pienso que Dios te ha dado la oportunidad de seguir con tu vida y admiro tu valor, tu abnegación, tu lucha etcétera. Mi nombre es Jorge López Rodríguez tengo 48 años y vivo en San José, Costa Rica. Soy fiel admirador desde que he conocido tu historia. Me has dado valor para seguir adelante y he visto que vida continua y que no todo esta perdido. Eres mi IDOLO para llenarme de valor y continuar con mi vida. Bueno, espero puedas leer el mail, desgraciadamente no hablo ni escribo en Inglés pero espero que alguien pueda traducirtelo para que podamos estar en contacto. Me suscribo de tí en espera de una pronta respuesta. Muy Cordialmente.

From: Alfredo

Heather, hello. First of all, excuse my bad English. To be honest, I had to lean on the Google translator to write to you. Last night I saw your case on TV, in a program of Investigation Discovery. I was very shocked because I do not understand how there can be people who commit such a crime. But also really caught my attention the way you have faced this situation. So, I entered on the internet and I saw that you have a page on the net. You're a great woman, admirable, no doubt .. I am a Venezuelan journalist. ZETA magazine work (general coordinator) here in Caracas. I decided to write to you, so that you receive from me words of courage, more than you have, so you can continue on without fainting so that you always have happiness stolen and that you deserve. The Lord and the Virgin of El Valle Venezuela will also be always by your side .. A hug, a kiss and God bless.

From: Ricardo

Hello, Heather..My name's Ricardo and I'm writing from Brazil...I've just watched on OWN the story of your life and I just couldn't help writing this msg to you to say how much I admire your strength and how blessed you were by having a paramedic so nearby to bring you back to life, even though you screamed for letting you go..I absolutely cried along with the tears you dropped when you said that..that definitely moved me deeply!!...God bless you and your wonderful family..brave and caring parents and wonderful kids...As I heard you saying at the beggining of the story, back in the 80's you used to wake up in the morning and inhale life..please, never leave that behind...So, never let your beautiful smile off your face and keep up with your mission on inspiring others to learn to live again..You have definitely inspired one more..here in Brazil...Thanks a lot!!

From: Gayle

Good Morning Heather: I saw your story on the Investigation Discovery network Saturday and cannot get you and your story out of my mind so I did a search for you on the internet and came across your website. Reading your story is inspiring and yet makes me mad enough to wonder why there is no longer the death penalty for certain offenses and this is definitely one of them! I have been married twice myself and both of my former spouses were verbally abusive and cheated on me so they are no longer my spouses! My children's father is also an alcoholic and I had had my fill of that scenario as well. Reading your website has inspired me to find a way to help victims of domestic abuse in my area. My oldest son has a schoolmate whose dad killed his mother in the driveway and then turned the gun on himself. Of course this happened because the Family Court system here in Michigan did not think that the father was mentally unstable! Now the kids live with her parents in Ohio, which is sad because they had to start a new life there. My personal opinion of Family Court here in Michigan (and probably anywhere) is that it really does not protect the kids or some of the victims either. The minute the system fails for one person, it fails them all. I would love to send you a contribution, but I lost my job on March 8th. I am actively looking and hope that my situation will change soon. In the meantime, know that I include you in my prayers.

- Gayle, Troy, Michigan

From: Tim

Hello Heather, I don't know if you remember me or my mother and father John and Kathy Lucas from Stayton Oregon,John Lucas Chevrolete, but I wanted to first of all say how sorry I am for what happened to you. When I heard that Ron did that I began to wonder if he was possibly involved in my fathers murder in any way. My father was murdered in November of 1987. I am just wondering if there is any connection there. My mother said that when you were on the east coast like NY or NJ or somewhere before my fathers murder and that everyone was up stairs getting dressed and ready to go out and that Ron became very upset when he spotted my father was merely talking to you in the bar. My mother said that Ron had someone put a pie in my fathers face. Perhaps you do not remember this, but I am just curious if Ron had a vendetta or something against my father for some reason. My mom sure did like you and I am sure would love to see you again some day or at the very least say hello. Well I hope your your doing as well as you can.

- Sincerely, Tim

From: Sabinr

Hallo Heather, I live in Vienna and watched TV and saw your story. I was shocked. You are a powerful person. You kann be very proud about you to raise your children and that you kann smile. i am sorry, but my english is not so good. I would like to tell you more and i do not know how to do it.

- Dearly Sabine

From: Norma

Comments: I was 38, a professional, and a single mother of 3 when I met Neil. Looking back, I was alot more vulnerable than I realized. A few short months after I met Neil, he was "desperately needing a place to live" so I let him move in with my children and I. The first year or two were pretty good. Neil was caring and attentive, and he was good to my kids. Then we got married. Within a few weeks of our wedding his true self began to show. The first was his financial irresponsibility. Before long he began verbally abusing me, and shortly after that he began verbally abusing my children. Then one day he struck one of my kids. Of course he had many excuses, which I fell for. After all, he loved me... and my kids.... right? To make a long story short... the abuse got worse and the finances started falling apart. Neil's financial irresponsibility began catching up and the debt collectors began calling, which made him more volatile. Within 2 years he had maxed out my credit cards and overdrew our bank accounts on multiple occasions. He always had excuses, and would lie to cover up his lies... but I finally decided I had enough and laid it on the line. I told Neil I would no longer put up with is abuse or finance his irresponsible lifestyle, and he needed to decide what his priorities were... so he chose to move out. Frankly, by that time, I was actually relieved, which was a total surprise to him. Neil had convinced himself I couldn't live without him. After a couple of weeks, Neil began calling me, expressing regret for having moved out but would not accept responsibility for his verbal, physical, or financial abuse. I suggested marriage counselling and he agreed. Neil followed through on the counselling for a few sessions, during which time he continued to lie.. but this time it was not just to me... it was now to the therapist as well.... it really opened my eyes. The counsellor later asked me if I thought the counselling had helped. I said, "it didn't do 'us' a bit of good, but it did me a world of good". I knew then that the I was 'done' with the relationship. That's when the nightmare started. Neil began showing up at my home for a variety of reasons/excuses. Each and every time, after he left, something would be malfunctioning in/around my home. The worst was when Neil had been to visit, and before he left I wittnessed him removing the lid to our water well (drinking water and household supply). Within 2 days the water developed a strong offensive odor which irritated my skin in the shower. Upon inspection by officials it was determined that our well had been deliberately contaminated by an external source, and a styrofoam cup with residue of swine flesh was found floating in the well. At that time Neil was working in a hog processing plant. In the end, I had to spend nearly $10 000 to drill a new well and trench to supply the house with this new water supply. Following that incident I had my home burgalurized, my vehicle vandalized, endured harrassment at my workplace, multiple harrassing phone calls, multiple threats of violence/death, and Neil and/or is friends showing up at my home and terrorize my children and I. Finally after approximately 6 years, I was able to convince local law enforcement that the threats to my family and I were real, and that legal intervention was needed to prevent a lethal outcome. I was fortunate enough that this occurred between 2003 and 2007 when anti-stalking legislation had been put in place in our area. Neil was sentenced to 10 years before parole eligibility. He has his first parole hearing in 2019. My children are now grown and have moved on with their lives. I have since moved and remarried. I appologize for the long winded email... My experience has scarred my life and I find it therapeutic to tell my story. Thank you for all the great work you do. If it weren't for people like you... crusading for the rights of survivors of domestic violence.... I would have likely become another one of the statistics that we both could have been. I am forever grateful... Thank you again.

From: Maree

Dear Heather, wow, I am so thrilled to hear from you and I know about the foundation and am hopeful very soon to be able to donate to assist now that my husband after many months of unemployment has found work!! I am in awe of your strength - I watched you on the television and to be honest, I felt as if my heart was breaking if one can describe that feeling. Your children have done so well that is fantastic. My daughter Tanisha and I were in Los Angeles in 2010 as she was invited to take part in the World Championships of Performing Arts with many countries competing. She was only 10 at the time and got to the semifinals for her acting and singing. She has just auditioned and got the lead role to play Sally Brown from the production of "You're a Good Man Charlie Brown" to be performed here during the Adelaide Fringe Festival in March 2013 so she will busy rehearsing soon. She is very musical as well. We are hopeful in being back in LA,California in June next year for the Championships again as Tanisha has been asked to represent Australia. I have two daughters, my daughter Symone (who is married) turns 36 in December this year and my daughter Tanisha turns 13 next week on 3rd November. Yes, there is a huge age difference as I was divorced when Symone was 7 and did not remarry until around 15 years later much to my surprise having my second daughter at age 41. I have two grandchildren Lara almost 10 and Konstantine almost 5. I work as a paralegal for a law firm and we specialize in personal injury claims. My husband is a barber by trade but works as a painter in the building trade painting new homes. We are lucky to have our own home which is small but has a big yard. You should not feel burdened. You were a victim and the suffering you endured to say the least was inhumane. You are not at fault. Unfortunately there are too many “sick, violent, aggressive, selfish, control freaks” out there. Your mum and dad love you no matter what that is what unconditional love is. I will stay in touch and look forward to buying your book!!! Lots of love and regards to you, hope to hear from you very soon.

From: Joyce

Dear Heather, YOU ARE AMAZING! It is unbelievable what we go through. I am so proud of you for speaking up, educating others, and being the great Mom you are to your children! I live in Mesa, Az. I am glad you are writing a book, and so many people need to be educated. It is no coincidence that when all of us domestic violence survivors get together, we share so much, have so much in common, and can help each other. I am still stunned that even though I had multiple restraining orders, several police reports, and witnesses, and hadn't seen or heard from the ex . in about 4 years, the judge looked at me at the end of the divorce trial, and asked me , "Well, if this all really happened, where's your video and pictures for proof?" Stunning how ignorant people are. Now, I am fighting for my children, whom I've had since birth. We're just waiting for the next court date. We all care about you and your family and pray for you every day. I hung your article up on my door, of our house. I go to Chrysalis (in Phoenix), for domestic abuse survivors, and I gave them your newest newspaper article, and they now share it with others and have it in their office. You are truly our hero! You are a beautiful woman, inside and out. With all you have to do, I thank you for taking the time to write back so soon. We would love to have you do a speaking engagement. I will get back to you, as soon as I can figure out what we can do. You're awesome.

From: Maree

Hello Heather, just a hello to say to you that you are an amazing person.... I am from Adelaide, South Australia, Australia and watched you on Foxtel today in the series of Crime Investigation.......I do not how you got through it all, your children are wonderful and your mum and dad amazing.........My heart was heavy and I cried.........I would love to be able to keep in contact from time to time........there are no words to actually express what I feel........speak to you soon I hope.........regards,Maree and family

From: Patti

Hi Heather, I graduated with you years ago at Anoka class of 84. I remember you as a nice person. I didn't really know you I just saw you around. I just heard your story and found your website. I just wanted to say that you are an inspiration. I really liked this quote of yours - "Do not expect life to be fair. Life isn't fair. Make the most of it. There is a reason to smile. Find it, after all you are really lucky just to be alive. Your state of mind determines who you are and what you become so think positive! " I hope that one day there is a cure for spinal cord injuries. I have a neurological disorder (Transverse Myelitis) that has made walking difficult for me & some other side effects from it as well and I consider myself a very lucky person. Your story makes me want to do more for others with disablities. Thanks for fighting the good fight. Wishing you the best.

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How You Can Help

Heather Grossman's ex-husband hired a man to kill her in 1997. He was not successful in his attempt to take her life, but the gunshot wound left Heather paralyzed from the neck down. Heather was just 31 years old with three young children. During the years since the incident, Heather's family has been doing everything they can to keep her alive and well, but expenses are high, and they need as much help as they can get.

Since Heather's new website launched on September 21 with the Paypal Donation Options, Heather's family has received donations from quite a few generous people. Please take a moment to see who has donated to Heather's family so far.
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My Story

I’m a mother, mentor and a survivor of domestic violence. Ten years ago domestic violence forever changed my life and the lives of my family. As the bullet penetrated my spinal cord, it shattered many hopes, dreams and my ability to function as I once did but it did not destroy me or my will to live. Ten years ago my ex-husband, Ron Samuels, hired men to murder me. I died at the scene of the crime but was brought back to life by a paramedic.

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